At the Staff Lounge, and , what is a gracious society?

At the Staff Lounge
Because of the lack of space at my desk, i marked at the staff lounge table instead. it's more comfortable, there's music, and having company definitely helped!

L was there, and i learnt about Latin and other languages.
Y was there and i learnt about differing views about teaching languages to young kids.
T was there, and i was given history/ ethnic lessons about my roots - teochew, Upper Serangoon/Hougang thingy.

I think marking together is a good bonding activity. And a good learning opportunity.

Does not holding the door mean we are rude?
When A reads the papers near me, she often covers my papers partially when she turns a page. Perhaps i am too much of a territorial being, but i do notice such things.

"Ok, maybe she doesn't realise our papers are too close together," I'd think, and shift my papers away.

Then when she began covering entire sections, including the part i was reading, i wondered if i have ever offended her. i mean, how could anyone not notice THAT right? plus the table is huge. why squeeze next to me and keep trying to cover my papers? But then she was quite cordial with me at all other times, so i didn't think anymore about it.

Today it happened again.
And soon after, B came too, and he did the same thing!!!!!! He covered my newspaper with his!

At this point, let me make it clear that i am NOT complaining about them nor ranting in anger a la Xiaxue. I'm not angry at all, I was just surprised. I grew up learning i should not block my grandparents/uncles/aunties/ parents' view of the television, and hence thought everyone would be careful not to block others' view of the newspaper.

So i was surprised to find 2 persons who did not suscribe to my parents' teaching.

My first thought was that it simply was their culture. (they are of the same nationality.)

Then i thought some more and realized ... hey, it could be ME who's weird and hyper-territorial! (there's a carved pattern at the middle of the headrest of our bed which serves as marker between munch's side of the bed and mine.) (What! i need my space right!)

You see, logically, what's the big deal about having to lift my papers and shifting it slightly when i want to read the covered bits? So, possibly, to A and B, (and possibly everybody in the world except me) this is simply not an issue at all! Maybe everyone reading this is thinking, "Siao already. Why is she talking about people covering her page? Just shift then can read already wat. Liddat also can blog."

Somehow, what everybody sees as a non-issue, i may see as inconsideration!

Now, a while ago, and ever so often, we read complaints about Singaporeans being rude and ungracious. Who decides what is gracious and what is not? Are we SOMETIMES judged to be rude and ungracious because our habits differ from The Critic?

Like how it's common for people here to use cellphones on the train but the Japanese regard that as rude?

Or take the door holding issue. OK, when someone's arms are occupied, or is too weak/little/old to push the door open, or an access code/card is needed to re-open the door, it IS only right to hold the door open if there's someone right behind. Because it really would help/ convenience them.

But if my arms are free to push the door open, i wouldn't mind it in the least if the person ahead of me simply walks right through without holding the door for me. I quite prefer that actually. It makes for smoother traffic.

Plus, what if there are many others after me, all young and strong and not pushing prams? Does it mean he/she would have to stand there till the stream of people ends?

Sure, it looks and feels nice to have someone do that, but only because we are "taught" that this behaviour is a manifestation of graciousness. It doesn't really make a big difference practically.

Note to young gentlemen: Still, do it anyway. Society prefers it.
And we all have to live by Generally Accepted Protocol.

Like China has to stop spitting coz The Critics who are going for the Olympics find that offensive.
Like Singapore has to smile and open doors, coz The Critics who are here find these important.

It's not a matter of good or bad, right or wrong. It's just a matter of who The Critic is, what The Critic happens to like/dislike, and whether we want to pander to The Critic's preferance make The Critic feel at home.

Generation gap

Funny how the comments on my blog entries always seem to run off at a tangent.
I talk about scary freaky chicken, i get comments about alien-like behaviour.
I talk about obsessive-compulsive behaviour, i get comments about my husband and learning piano.

I think it's a youth thing.

Their minds just work differently. What is the main point to me is not what interests them.
I teach my students that sometimes practice and repetition is needed to help us learn and master things, and all they remember are the funny japanese uncles and the Zuiikin Girls going "You drive me crazy" or " I was robbed by two men".

Weird.
But so cute.

Obsessive-Compulsive

Throat hurts bad.
The kind that feels like a razor blade is slicing the throat, and makes the eyes water.
My fault... should have gone to bed a little earlier last night, but was marking - and watching tv till 2am.

i'm quite obsessive-compulsive sometimes. I never used to watch tv, then suddenly a silly craze would start and i'd watch too much. Like the Meteor Garden phase, the Prison Break phase, the Law & Order phase. And i'd read all the episode guides as well.

Dunno what was wrong with me last night. I watched and watched and watched. Desperate Housewife, After Hours (gosh that was one lame, pointless show.) , some sit-coms that i cannot remember, Beauty & the Geek (I like!!), L&O, MAximum Exposure, America's Next Top Model...

I felt sick, i wanted to sleep, i knew i had to wake up early the next day, YET I STILL WATCHED! (and marked... marginally...)

I'm baffled. Am i not a minute-pinching miser when it came to Time? What came over me? i squandered 200 min yesterday!

Or, like when i played silly computer games. And i mean silly! like the catch butterfly game, or the mice-swopping game, or the pipe-building game, or even like minesweeper, or Jewels. Or haha.... snake, when i first got my cellphone.

After each round, i'd keep thinking i died a stupid death and that i could do better, and i'd try again and again.

"One more try and i'll stop"

...

"AHHHH that was dumb! That round not counted. Coz got stupid mistake. One more try.".

....

"AAAAAHHHHH... try again..."

...

Until i hear the birds...and look up... and realize... Damn. Sky's bright. I forgot to sleep AGAIN. And my finger hurts from clicking too much.

And then there was the time i read about a pianist who practiced every day with a bag of beans next to him. Each time he played a song perfectly, he's take a bean from the bag and put it on the other side. Whenever a mistake was made, he would put ALL the beans back into the bag, and start over. And he'd do this till he got the beans all across.

So i was inspired to do that too, and spent 8 hours on the piano that day. I still didn't manage to get all the beans across. Which probably explains why i'm far from being a professional pianist now.

Well, at least THOSE harmed only myself. Then there were those times when i needed company to indulge in my latest obsessions. Like how i made munch play through the ENTIRE BOX of Taboo at one sitting.

"Nooooo! Why were we so slow? With our understanding of each other and communication, we should be able to get all the answers!! Try again!"

"Hey. all correct! So fun! Let's try again!"

" NOOOOoooooOOOoo, that was lousy. We must try again..."

And i refused to let him have dinner till the box was completed.

And that was before we got married, yet he still went ahead and marry me... that sweet, brave thing...



Madness? (i mean me, not munch)
Well, let's just call it determination or "age quod agis" shall we? ;)