Of Eyes and Heart.

The Eyes
It's so easy to think we are seeing, when we are not. And then we get frustrated in the process, coz we lose sight of the REAL goal and the REAL battle.
At the Christian Teachers' TDay Conference today, i was reminded that our struggle is NOT against flesh and blood - students, parents, time, colleagues nor systemic flaws. Our war is against the darkness and godlessness that is trying to attack our youths.
Our struggle is not with kids acting up and fighting, or us getting discouraged or tired or ill or otherwise preoccupied on saturday afternoons.
Our struggle is not against frustrations in ministry, hurts in our hearts, people who would wound us to get their way.
Our Fight goes beyond what our eyes can see, we need the eyes of our hearts.
We need to see that we are in a great divine story, we need to know which scene we're at so we don't get perplexed or thrown off.

As Gandalf describes the tale,
"Fate has chosen him.
A fellowship will protect him.
Evil will hunt him."

Evil will hunt us. That's where we are now. It's not quite the "happily ever after" part yet.
And whether or not we perceive with the eyes of our hearts does matter - If i feel the discouragement and weariness in my heart, and try to reason it with the eyes, i'd say i need a break, i've been in this for too long, i'm not the right person for the job. i'd look for a way outta here.
But if i perceive with the eyes of my heart, i'd recognize the battle and say "get thee behind me, Satan". I'd gird up my loins, be focused and alert.I'd stand stronger.
So my dear me, take a good look, and SEE those issues for what they really are. Put on your spiritual armour, and pray!

The Heart

The Tin Woodman's story...
Nick Chopper used to make his living chopping down trees in the forests of Oz. He worked hard in order to fulfill his greatest desire: to marry the love of his life, a Munchkin maiden.
The Wicked Witch of the East enchanted his axe to prevent him from marrying his beloved: The enchanted axe chopped off his limbs, one by one.
Each time he lost a limb, a tinsmith replaced it with a limb made of tin. Initially, it seemed an advantage, for his metal body allowed him to work powerfully. With a heart of love, and limbs that never tire, it looked as if he had beaten the Wicked Witch!
However, one day the axe sliced him in two halves. The tinsmith who helped fix his torso neglected to give him a heart.
Once Nick Chopper was made entirely of tin, he was no longer able to love the girl he had fallen for. But he didn't think it mattered at first. In fact, he was pleased with his tireless body, and that the axe could no longer cut him as he was made entirely of tin. So he worked on - he worked hard... without love.
Till he got rusted and had time to think.
And he found... he wanted a heart back, coz he was happiest when he could love.

***
Weren't we pleased when we got for ourselves arms and legs of tin.
Weren't we pleased when we learnt how to cope with life,
to excel at work, to swing with ministry, to use our gifts.
Weren't we pleased when we worked with all our might,
when our hearts were filled with love.

Who knew, when that fatal blow struck,
cut us in two, and broke our hearts.
And we thought we just needed to be fixed.
"A metal body, and make it quick!"
And we quickly got back into things....

Who knew, when our metaled body did all the work
faster, better than before?
well oiled, unflinching,
toughened, no longer afraid of the axe?
Who knew that the heart isn't there?
Did we?
We manically go on chopping and chopping,
falling trees at an unprecedented speed.
did we care that we didn't feel?
did we know that we couldn't feel?
As many trees as we can, as quickly as we can.

Marry my love? Or merely chopping trees?

When the joints stiffened, when the oil ran out,
When we were struck down and were forced to think...

We find we need a heart...

****
Matt Redman
When the music fades and all is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing just to bring something that's of worth
That will bless Your heart

I'll bring You more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what You have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about You
All about You, Jesus
I'm sorry, Lord, for the things I've made it
When it's all about You
All about You, Jesus

King of endless worth, no one could express
How much You deserve
Though I'm weak and poor, all I have is Yours
Every single breath

I'll bring You more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what You have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about You
All about You, Jesus
I'm sorry, Lord, for the things I've made it
When it's all about You
All about You, Jesus
***

Jesus, take me past the knowledge that it has got to be all about You,
give me that heart that simply whispers, screams, sings, hums "Jesus" all the time.