Remember to Breathe

Keep forgetting to breathe.
Can't be forgetful to THAT extent right?

Feeding time

Civil Service Gripes

"Consent Form for Learning Journey- to distribute and collect from all students.

Edusave form for learning journey - to distribute and collect from all students. If they have insufficient funds in edusave, collect $9 from them.

Edusave form for Sec Three Camp- to distribute and collect from all students. If they aren't Singaporeans, not enough funds in edusave etc, collect $180 cash. If they cannot come, call parents, ask for receipt of trip, look for student, ask them to see VP. After holidays, check their passport to see if they were indeed away from Singapore.

Sea Sport Form for Sec Three Camp.

Issue Donation Draw Booklets, get each student to write down the serial number, sign. Collect back, ensure all sold, $60 paid.

Collect Bulk Collection Money. Amount depends on MT of student/ subsidies eligible etc.

Each long weekend and holiday, issue and collect back Travel Declaration forms."

It's a common gripe of teachers. Too much admin work. Yes, i know it is necessary. students need these "outdoor lessons" to learn better, and parents need to be informed of such activities. money is needed for such activities, so cash must be collected, and forms need to be filled up so that we know that they know.

but frankly, if you categorize it, it doesn't fall under "teaching" (which, i think, is what teachers do) . It sounds a lot like EAS work. But you see, because of the sheer volume, the EAS staff cannot handle the load of it all. (funny hor, actually that is what they are paid to do leh. can just say "cannot cope" and push it to teaching staff ah? cannot cope, then improve on the system la!)

But since our bosses list admin work as part of our job scope, then fair enough. no one forced me to be a teacher. so when i choose to be a teacher, i know i have to get these done.

Oh wait... just had a thought. Maybe by collecting forms, we ARE teaching our students. "See, that's how we arrange things in order, according to INDEX NUMBER. See boys? Fascinating isn't it?"

Ok Ok... i know they are necessary, it's just that... when everything piles together, and we have to cope with admin and managing and cca and students' parents and being a parent-friend-teacher-counsellor-disciplinarian to our students, it IS a HUGE pile. Plus, because there's no "ADMIN PERIOD", all these form-collection/ money collection etc has to be done in-between periods. Way-lay them as they are walking to the next class, or sneak a few forms to some students during morning assembly, forgo lunch and make students late for lunch by hijacking them as the bell rings....

Anyway, as i was saying, i know they need to be done, i know it's my job to do them, but it's frustrating how much time admin work takes up, when the time would have been spent more fruitfully on lesson preparation, chatting with students, remedial lessons, brainstorming and improving things...

Really. Isn't there a better way to do all these? Isn't there a more efficient way to deal with these necessary evils?

Gosh. The LJ and Camp are compulsory anyway... why must we "ask" the parents for authorisation to deduct money from the Edusave Funds? If there's money inside, and the students HAVE to attend the courses, just deduct directly la! Which parent would rather pay cash than use the money the government gives?

When Singaporeans leave the country, doesn't the immigration department scan their passports? Don't they know which countries we go to? Why must they invent this useless thing called a Travel Declaration Form? If SARs or Avian Flu strikes us then GET THE IMMIGRATION DEPT TO PROVIDE US WITH THE INFO LAH! It should be readily available wat! Just filter visitors to affected countries, then inform the school la!
Meanwhile, while it is not necessary, no need to kill trees and waste man-hours compiling info which is usually not used, and worse, could easily be assessed by another govt department anyway.

Really. Just tie up the Info system structure, and for once, use IT to make life easier. But noooooo.... with all the money pumped into IT, "they" decide to create MORE platforms, where we have to re-enter the same data all over again, in all the various applications. Surely they can see how dumb this all is??? Why all the double work when it's suppose to help us process info more efficiently???????

And, this thing about consent form... it's compulsory activity RIGHT? if they do not consent, they'd have to give us a letter of excuse RIGHT? then just send out a letter, or better still put it on PTS so the onus is on parents to check what activity their sons have! What? Not all parents have access to internet you say? AH HA! then why make us re-key in test dates and results into PTS??? Not all parents are able to check their sons' test dates and results online also RIGHT?

Bleddy civil service. the difference in productivity between private sector and govt depts is REAL i tell you.


And the students? some of them simply CANNOT take a form home, get it signed, and hand it up. Why is that difficult? But ask for a form back, and you get a blank stare... "huh? what's that? i dun have" then they'd rummage through their bags and find it, and present it with a pleased look. And then you'd discover that it's the same form, still unsigned, but crumpled, muddy and torn. "Please get it signed tonight. Make sure you pass it to me tomorrow!" I'd say hopefully. At least we're a step closer right? At least now he knows what form i'm talking about right? But nooooooo..... the story repeats.

And the teachers? This simple work of collecting forms and money... Isn't it supposed to be a straight-forward piece of chore? Ahhh, but this lousy teacher, with a degree, a post-grad dip, trained in Accountancy CAN'T GET IT DONE AFTER 2 WEEKS!!!!
And here she is ranting and raving in her stoopid BLOG, instead of re-designing the administrative system, improving things, or telling the Minister of Education to do something about this.

See! I told you! Lousy stupid civil servants....

Disclaimer:

All reference to "Civil servants" refer only to me, Mrs Faith Wong-Yeo.

I'm sure all other civil servants are productive, bright, fruitful, efficient folks, happily doing their duties. Administrative duties don't faze them at all.

I will learn to be like them.

And i will stop ranting.

And i will invisiblize this post once i get over it (ie once my darling 3e5 gives me all the all-important forms.)

What?

Your Outrageous Name is:

Sue Edge

Outrageous Name Generator

Ha... how did they come up with it?

Mabbe they calculated some birth-digits or something...

Can't be... all they asked for were my name and gender.

But it does sound like my chinese name, no?

Sue - Edge... Shu - Yan...

well... ok... not really.

My parents-in-law were talking abt "Auspicious Names" when we went over for lunch 2 days ago.

When munch was young, he had a new name invented too! *grinz*

Kuang Jun. Quite nice la.

God gives me my new special name too...

"To him who overcomes, i will give some of the hidden manna. i will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it." Rev 2:17.

it's a secret name. shhhhh....

CNY 2007

Cheated...
bladed on Day 2 instead of visiting.
played badminton and worked on Day 3 instead of visiting.
But will/must visit next year.
Not many chances to meet up with relatives... as it is, with some of them, i only get to see them once a year. wouldn't wanna lose contact...
so sad if my kids grow up not knowing Da Yi or Lynn or Adrian.
Perhaps dad feels sad about us not being close to Siling, wanyong etc... think he was pretty close to their parents.
missed breakfast with dad n mum n kor n khian on Day 1. planned to rush back to neram before church but couldn't get up.
gosh... i'm really having difficulties waking up these days. made it to church tho. phew.
perhaps should stay over at neram on Nuya eve next year. Miss being forced to wake up early by mum for the new year breakfast. ha, it felt like such a torture last time, but i actually miss it now.
gosh i love them.

wanted: SKII whitening mask

morning assemblies have been enriching these weeks.

BUT

I'm getting a tan from morning assembly.

help!

PS:

Students who read this blog: YOU cannot complain coz u are guys. Guys must be tough, and guys look better tanned. So there.

Thank You for the Thank Yous

When I was little, my daddy taught us to say “thank you” and welcome. My brother and I would then try to out-do each other by being over-the-board “courteous”.
“Thank You!”
“You’re welcome.”
“Thank you for the welcome!”
“Welcome for the thank you for the welcome…”
And we’d giggle and see how long we could keep it up.

Wad. We were in kindergarten lor, how mature do u expect us to be?

But anyway, last weekend, I received some very precious thank yous. And I thank God for the Thank You’s.

Sometimes “Thanks” is precious because it makes us feel appreciated. That’s nice. But that’s not something I need, nor "deserve", coz I’m not some great sacrificial sage who suffered for years in silence out of the goodness of my heart. I have done nothing to shout or feel great about. All that I do is simply what a teacher who loves God and loves her students would do.
But these “Thanks” were even more special because they told me that these boys have really grown into men… and to put it in clichéd but true terms, they’ve become men for others.

Receiving results must be a very stressful, emotional event. All your effort put into your studies seems to be “validated” by that piece of paper. Then u gotta start planning for the next step, deal with your emotions, deal with your parents’ emotions etc…
It must have been an overwhelming day for many of them. It would have been easy to be self-absorbed.

Yet they remembered to say thanks…

So… that’s my bonus. Not that I’m appreciated, but that they’ve become more and more other-centered. That they would overcome their shyness, and make the effort to write/sms/say thanks.

你们长大了！

Teaching is more rewarding than what anyone thinks. =)

Wholeness in Character @ Brighton

Hoping to be a Housewife, Learning to be a Leader

I've always harboured hopes of being a housewife. Especially when i'm overworked, stressed, tired... or just feeling lazy. How nice, if my duty in life is simply to make breakfast for munch, clean up the house, and go for gym/spa/facials/shopping in the afternoon, then come home and prepare a grand feast for dinner. Then i'd stand near the door, where i'd be able to hear munch coming home, and rush to greet him when he returns. Then he'd heartily enjoy the sumptious dinner, complete with homemade desserts (new one every day), and we'd go for a walk where he'd tell me all about his day.
And when the kids come along, i'd take them swimming in the afternoons, or go for picnics at the beach, where they can play, finish up their schoolwork, and we'd discover the great outdoors together. Then we'd prepare dinner for Daddy together, and surprise him at the door when he returns from work.
Ha. Very politically-incorrect... like a step backwards for feminists. hiakz. but that's my ideal life ;P I wanna be a xiao nu ren.

But... i know that's not what God has planned for me. haiz.... not a chance. God has made it quite clear.

So i suppose i have to learn.

Had work review with lloyd on monday.
And i know what i'm to work on. Managerial, leadership.
yes, i'm still stuck there.

The way i run the NE Committee, or the Kidz Club... it is apparent to me what i lack.
i just find it so hard to keep monitoring, insisting on my way, ensure compliance etc. i cut people too much slack. i don't push hard, i don't "scold", i care too much that everyone feels good and happy. Ha... remember writing about it before. my "paiseh-style" of leadership.
God allows me to see the vision, and my heart is very combustible when it comes to visions from God. But it's the managerial, day-to-day strategies, and monitoring of people that makes it fall flat.

I thought about it and decided i really dunno how to do it.
I thought of retreating, or just staying put and not learning, but i know that's not what God intends.
I thought about it and i still dunno how to learn it.
The only thing i know to do is pray that God will give that to me.

Pray pray pray then...

but i dunno how to answer to lloyd when he asks me what my plans to work on my AFIs are.

"i've decided to pray and ask God for the gift of managerial skills."

Happily Ever After

When young, "happily ever after" was to be expected. it was an assumption that one day, everything works out. Good triumphs over evil, Prince comes on white horse (or silver ferrari), fairy-tale wedding takes place, and then comes the proverbal "happily ever after". Funny how fairy tales always end at the wedding. Didn't Cinderella have kids? How well did Sleeping Beauty and her husband get along? Would he complain that she slept too much? Who did the housework? oh wait. they all married princes/had fairy godmother. i suppose housework was never an issue.
As i grew, being one of the tail-end Gen X-er, the castles disappeared, and cynicism took their place instead. What prince? Why would i want to get married at all? There's no such thing as "happily ever after" - that's only for Disney stories. When a dose of Reality gets thrown into the equation, "happily ever after" seems to vaporize.
or so i thought.
But truth is, i think in many aspects, i am living in the "happily ever after". Not boringly simple like the last line in story books, but in little nuggets, hidden amongst the Realities.

Like marriage with Munch. Sure, we didn't have the grandest glitziest wedding, we're not like some storybook couple. Yet, so much of it is so ... ideal. Open communication, harmonious relationship, common passion. He's patient, encouraging, and so appreciative of every small thing i do.
And the pleasures we share... like waking up early for our daily prayer & breakfast. It's just... such a nice, fuzzy-warmy thing i get to enjoy EVERYDAY. And updating each other about our day in school, knowing that we're both understood and supported. Like strolling together, dining at a nice place occasionally... it's almost too good to be true, and better than simply "happily ever after".

And when i take a good look around, i find many other things that are so delightful. Like the lives that are changed and transformed, like the students who have grown in character and maturity and wisdom... Yeah, once in awhile things happen, and the boat seems to be rocked, yet when i look carefully, the growth is real and good!

i like the nuggets of "happily ever after" that i see.
it's not ALL perfect YET.
but for now, i am thankful for the nuggets.

Ermmm...Thanks...

Yay-hey! It's Friday!
What a week it's been...
Meaningful, revealing, sometimes upsetting, sometimes disappointing, sometimes filled with hope of a better tomorrow, sometimes filled with thoughts of what could have been and should have been...

Philippians 4
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.


When faced with harsh and difficult situations, Paul didn't sulk or go into depression nor gave up his life mission. "Rejoice" he wrote.
Remember the reality of God, remember He is close by. Just pray, remember God is real, remember the things He has done and give thanks, and pray. Obey, and rest in God's peace.

Like... so simple ah?

Here we go then.... i shall not worry about the many things. i shall just give thanks for the week, and pray.

So, God Dearest, Thanks! Yeah, actually, the week has really been meaningful and precious. Although there were many incidents that i wished never happened, i suppose they were lessons for me and others.

I think a main thanksgiving would be the meet up with her. You know i needed it. and i thank You for it. so... was it the closure i need? Or did i even need a closure at all? Well, ministry-wise, meeting with her was like an extra-confirmation of what God said to me. i have peace, and i know what's the right thing to do. But mentorship-wise & relationally, i think it isn't closed, and it doesn't need to be closed. hehe... sounds like some "soul-tie" thingy, but i think it is not a bad thing that we need to discard, but a precious thing that is meant to be there. we have inherited a portion, we have received something into our spirits. And i still want to keep inheriting ... there's still so much more she's got that i want to learn!! so... i dunno... can it not be over? i'm still motherless leh...

And God, thanks for your faithfulness in her life. It's so amazing, the way you made everything that counts work out. Hearing about how you saved & reconciled her family really built my faith. You are so real!!! and so faithful!!! Bless her Lord... not just in her work and family, but in her relationship with you. Just let everything else fade away - be all resolved or just be peaceful for a season or something. Let her find that place again Lord. There, she's safe. There, she's strong. There, she can do great things with clear convictions and clear directions from your spirit, and lead so many others closer to you. Let her be There, God!!!

And i want to be There too... Sorry that sometimes i act as if you are not real- by being anxious, rying to work things out by my own strength or human wisdom, or by neglecting to pray. Really, the power-place is right at your feet. Remind me often, God, so that i may live victoriously.

And thank you, Holy Spirit, for illuminating the issues and helping me understand and see. You are really the best teacher and counsellor! i suppose through the last year or so, i've had to grow up a bit more... and i know that somehow i am still not really 100% ok... the sense of detachment, the wariness and weariness... the occasional rebellious thoughts and feelings.....
Help me to keep coming to you lord...u know how tempting it is to just give up and escape. but i know you will give me the grace and strength to persevere, to be wise, to be discerning, to be submissive and fruitful.

I want to be There.