-_-

I've got a swollen eye.

Rubbed (or dig, as mummy calls it) my eyes too much last night and it got red and painful and swollen. Couldn't open it at first, and i was a little worried that my cornea flap was dislodged or something.

but at least it's better now - at least i can see with both eyes, though i still look strange. 

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i watched Red Cliff and Red Cliff 2 and i liked them, surprisingly. 

Though i have this strange inability to tell the characters apart. their names were all so similar, and they all look the same to me  (except for zhugeliang, tony leung and the jeff chang-lookalike) so i keep asking munch at every scene "who is this?" throughout the length of the two films.(God knows i need a patient husband and gave me munch =) ) I even had to draw up a character chart to facilitate my understanding of the show. 

But well, from what i understood and what munch explained, it was intriguing enough for me to read up on The Romance of The Three Kingdom on wiki. But it was even more confusing and there were like a zillion names. 

Sigh. 

i do hope this is not a sign of my (lack of) intelligence. hopefully it's just ummmm..... the temporary pregnancy brain thing.

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Again I'm starting to dread the later stages of pregnancy. Anticipating the leg cramps that strike when i least expect, jolting me out of whatever little sleep i can get. Piles. Backaches. Big belly that prevents me from lying face down. And worst of all . . . contractions, bursting water bag, checking dilation, and the pain and soreness after delivery, and the torture of the first poop and pee. Agh.

the baby part i like. =) I hope Destiny Faith is as easy as her sister.

- - - 

Uh-huh, that's her name currently. Destiny Faith Wong. 

Except it's a rather filifala name, people may not take her seriously. 

Imagine seeing it at the door of a clinic. 

Dr Destiny Faith Wong. 

Hmmmm... a bit no credibility hor? But quite ok for plastic surgeons i guess. i mean, even Woffles can be a name...

---

i'm babbling nonsense coz i have loads of other things on my mind.

Unhappy, grumpy other things.

Of standards and systems and decadence and stagnation.

Of institutions, of governance, of delusions and disappointments.

But there's no point in talking about them - i've tried.

There's no point in thinking about them - it makes me boil.

There's no point in mulling over them - there's nothing i can do.

so yeah.

i'm gonna focus my attention on things like learning about Chinese history, learning about communism & statism, worrying about labour (childbirth, not political party) and buying a playmat for Glory. The double sided one that can be folded up and can cushion falls and has pretty prints on both sides.

Ha, yah, i choose to act like an apathetic air-head.

The alternative is a crazed, grumpy, cynical pregnant woman.

Oh, but i'm not giving up u know. 

i may be helpless but He isn't.

be careful ah, i pray pray ah.