Next Chapter

It's confirmed. The page was turned, as pages often are. Only this time, instead of more of the same, i find a new chapter staring at me.
My little goldfish bowl for the past seven years is no longer home. I bought the boat, and the oars, and i'm headed for sea. No one's gonna sprinkle little specks of freeze-dried nutrients at regular intervals anymore. But on the other hand, i get to see something other than the same bowl, the same fish, the same seaweed and plastic seahorses. The water was getting murky anyway... i couldn't stay on and stay alive. Am excited about what's ahead... Is it faith? Is it optimism? Or is it just the novelty? Thinking of glitzing it up too, with some Interior Design course... but let me get used to the basics first.

The 2.5 ounces i was talking about? It's now something like 1.5 oz, and that's after a 12-hours intermission. Guess it's time for me to face the fact and move on.

In other news, i've kinda gotten used to wobbling. And because he who matters doesn't mind, i actually take perverse pleasure in it. It's quite funny... to feel it, and yet not fret. Empowering, i guess, in a way... like i've seen through it all... and i'm assured enough to live with it.
But it's not healthy of coz, so i gotta snap out of it. Blame it on the elapsed membership. When i move to a condo, it'll be on track, i reasoned. Or next week, when i'm more free. Or, hey, even tomorrow.... but tomorrow never comes, does it?

And then there's THAT painful chapter. The tomorrow that you wish would never come, but it always does. The chapter that i HATE. The good thing is, death is not the end. In this case, it's even the beginning of something glorious. She had lovely children and grandkids. She had a family trip just before she left. The final days must have been painful... but at least she's relieved of it now.
But my heart aches for my friend.
And i am afraid about tomorrow.
But what to do? The page has turned and that chapter is here.
In the end the only solace is that God is love. And that here with you, for now, are still many whom you love and who love you back.